If you reported your partner for domestic assault and they’ve been charged, you may now want to reconnect. Whether it’s to explain what happened, manage shared responsibilities, or arrange child care, contacting them might seem necessary—but doing so can result in your partner being charged with a criminal offence.
Can You Contact Your Partner? – No
If your partner has been charged with domestic assault, they are likely under a court order that forbids contact with you. This no-contact condition is legally binding. It may be part of a release order, an undertaking signed at the police station, or bail terms set by a justice of the peace. These orders typically prohibit direct communication, being at the same residence, and sometimes indirect communication through others.
Even if you want contact, your consent does not change the order. Only the court can modify or remove no-contact conditions. If your partner contacts you while the order is active, they can be charged with breaching their conditions—even if you initiated the contact. Courts often treat breaches more harshly than the original domestic assault charge.
Some release conditions include exceptions. For example, the court might allow third-party communication to arrange child exchanges. These exceptions will be clearly stated in the court order. If your partner has no such exception and still communicates, they are breaching the order.
What Can You Do Instead?
You can take legal steps to change the no-contact condition. If you want contact again, the process must go through proper channels. The most direct way is to retain a lawyer who can speak with the Crown attorney and request a variation of the release conditions. If the Crown agrees, they can help streamline the court application. If they don’t agree, your partner’s lawyer will need to bring a formal request to a judge.
You can also work with the Victim/Witness Assistance Program (VWAP). This program allows you to communicate your preferences to the Crown, especially if you don’t have a lawyer. You can explain whether you feel safe, whether you want the person to return home, and whether children are involved. VWAP helps you make your views known, but the Crown is not obligated to follow them.
It’s important to hire a lawyer. A lawyer can prepare an affidavit or letter stating your wishes and the context behind your original statement to the police. This may include emotional stress, intoxication, or a desire to resolve things privately. The Crown reviews this information when deciding whether to consent to a change in contact conditions. Until any legal change happens, you should not communicate with your partner.
If children are involved, use third-party arrangements to manage visits. That third party cannot pass messages between you and your partner. If they do, your partner can be charged with interfering with a witness or public mischief. Even a text or voicemail can result in legal trouble.
If you need to resolve parenting or housing issues, a family lawyer can work alongside the criminal lawyer. Family court can issue orders that sometimes influence bail or no-contact conditions, but these must still be recognized by the criminal court. Until a new order is issued, all current conditions must be followed.
Can You Drop Domestic Assault Charges Against Your Partner?
You cannot drop domestic assault charges once the police have laid them. In Ontario, and across Canada, charges are handled by the Crown attorney—not by the person who reported the incident. When the police believe there are reasonable grounds that an offence occurred, they are required to lay a charge. From that point on, the decision to proceed belongs entirely to the Crown.
The Crown makes decisions based on two criteria: whether there is a reasonable prospect of conviction, and whether continuing with prosecution serves the public interest. In domestic assault cases, the public interest almost always supports proceeding. The justice system takes allegations of domestic violence seriously because of its potential to escalate and its impact on families.
Your input as the complainant can be part of the Crown’s decision-making, but it’s not the final word. If you want the charges withdrawn, you can hire a lawyer to submit an affidavit or letter to the Crown. This document might explain your current views, your emotional state at the time of the report, and your interest in resolving the matter without a trial. A well-written affidavit can be helpful, but it does not guarantee that the Crown will stop the prosecution.
If you refuse to cooperate, the Crown can subpoena you to testify. If you do not appear in court after being subpoenaed, a material witness warrant can be issued for your arrest. You are also considered a witness in the case, and the Crown may compel your testimony even if you now oppose the prosecution.
If you want to help the accused resolve the case without a criminal record, you can ask their lawyer to request a peace bond or diversion. This usually depends on the severity of the allegations, your cooperation, and whether the accused accepts counselling or the Partner Assault Response (PAR) Program. These options are more likely in lower-risk cases.
How Long Do Domestic Assault Trials Take?
Domestic assault cases often take a long time to resolve. The duration depends on whether the Crown treats the case as a summary conviction or indictable offence:
- Summary cases—less serious charges—can take up to 18 months.
- Indictable cases—more serious charges—can take up to 30 months or more.
Most domestic assault charges are handled as summary offences in the Ontario Court of Justice. These cases still involve multiple steps: disclosure of evidence, meetings between lawyers, court appearances, trial scheduling, and sometimes programming like the PAR Program. If your partner completes a PAR Program and the Crown agrees, the case might resolve with a peace bond or discharge rather than a trial.
Even before trial, no-contact conditions usually stay in place. These orders don’t expire automatically. They remain in effect until the case ends, or until a court agrees to change them. That means months—or even years—without contact unless you take steps to vary the order.
The court process can be delayed by court backlogs, lawyer availability, or the need to gather more evidence. If children are involved or there’s an active family court process, the timeline might stretch further. If your partner fights the charges at trial, the process can involve testimony, cross-examinations, and expert witnesses.
The longer a case lasts, the more disruption it causes—especially for shared parenting, finances, and housing. If you want faster resolution or restored contact, the best approach is legal: communicate with the Crown through a lawyer, and follow all court processes.
You can see our full guide on Domestic Assault Charges in Ontario here
X-Copper Can Help
If you’re trying to understand your rights or change the conditions after a domestic assault charge, X-Copper can guide you through the process. We work with both accused individuals and complainants who want a legal resolution that reflects their current situation. Contact us to speak with an experienced legal professional.
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