If you’ve called the police on your partner and now regret it, there are options you can take. Many people in your position want to take it back but discover the process is not in their hands.
This blog explains what you can and can’t do about dropping domestic assault charges in Canada.
Can You ‘Drop’ Domestic Assault Charges Against Your Partner?
In Canada, once the police lay a domestic assault charge, you cannot withdraw it yourself. The authority to continue or stop a prosecution lies solely with the Crown attorney, not with the person who made the complaint.
When police respond to a domestic incident, they often charge someone if they believe an offence happened. Once a charge is laid, it becomes a matter between the accused and the prosecution. The Crown considers your input, but they don’t need your consent to proceed.
The Crown attorney decides whether to move forward with the case based on two things: whether there is a reasonable prospect of conviction and whether continuing the case is in the public interest. Domestic violence is always considered a public safety issue, which means the Crown almost always proceeds.
You can share your wishes with the Crown through a lawyer or through the Victim Witness Assistance Program (VWAP), but that doesn’t guarantee the charges will be dropped. Even if you explain that you were upset or that the situation has changed, the Crown might still go ahead, especially if they believe there’s a risk of ongoing abuse or pressure.
In some cases, if you don’t want to testify, you can be legally compelled to attend court. The Crown can issue a subpoena and, if you ignore it, a material witness warrant can lead to your arrest. You may have to explain to a judge why you didn’t come to court.
Despite these limits, your perspective still matters. The Crown will review any new statements you provide. This includes letters or sworn affidavits explaining your emotional state at the time of the call, any changes since then, and whether you feel safe now.
How to Make Sure Your Side of the Story is Heard
To have a voice in the prosecution, you will need to take several steps, but that does guarantee that you can control the outcome. The process begins by making your position clear and legally documenting it.
You should start by hiring your own lawyer. Your lawyer can draft an affidavit or letter that tells the Crown why you want the charges dropped. This statement often includes your explanation of what happened, whether you were under stress, drinking, or felt unsafe when the police were called. The lawyer can also say that you don’t want to be part of the case anymore and that you aren’t afraid now.
If you cannot afford a lawyer, the Victim/Witness Assistance Program (VWAP) can share your wishes with the Crown, though VWAP staff don’t work for you. They are court support workers, not legal advocates. Their input may be helpful, but it doesn’t carry the same weight as a legal submission from a lawyer.
If you gave a statement to police that you now believe was inaccurate, taken out of context, or made under pressure, you can try to correct your statement.This means giving a new statement or affidavit that explains the situation differently. Courts might accept that, especially if there’s evidence of emotional stress or intoxication at the time.
The Crown is often skeptical of early efforts of complainants to provide input on charges. They know that many people in abusive situations feel pressure to protect the person who hurt them. Because of this, they might wait several weeks before re-evaluating the file. During that time, they may ask for proof that things have changed, like showing your partner is attending counselling or taking part in the Partner Assault Response (PAR) program.
If your partner has already been released on bail or an undertaking, those conditions remain in place even if you want contact. Only the court can change those orders. If you make contact before the order is changed, your partner can be charged with breaching their conditions, which can be more serious than the original charge.
It’s important to be realistic. You can tell the Crown your position and explain the situation, but the final decision belongs to them. You are a witness in the case, not the one in charge of how it unfolds.
Issues with Retracting Domestic Assault Charges
Once domestic assault charges are laid, you do not control the process. The law treats these charges seriously because of the risk that a person might try to protect their partner out of fear, pressure, or financial dependence.
Even if you’ve changed your mind, the police report and your original statement remain part of the evidence. You can’t delete or undo what you told them. If you now say something different, the Crown might see that as unreliable. They may think you’re changing your story because you feel guilty, pressured, or afraid.
There is no automatic process to “undo” a statement. If you gave details that led to a charge, and you now want to clarify those, you’ll need to make a new statement. It should be given through a lawyer and supported with an affidavit that explains why the original version no longer reflects what you believe. This needs to be done carefully and with legal assistance. You could also face criminal liability for mischief or obstructing justice if this is done haphazardly.
The Crown may also suspect outside influence. If your partner is contacting you—directly or through someone else—while a no-contact order is in place, that contact is illegal. If the Crown believes your new statement is the result of such communication, they can use that against your partner in court. That kind of breach is treated very seriously.
Retracting charges doesn’t automatically remove your role as a witness. Even if you refuse to testify, the Crown can compel you with a subpoena. If you still refuse, they can request a warrant for your arrest. You may be brought to court and required to answer questions.
Because of all this, changing your mind after charges are laid is not seen as a simple choice. The legal system is set up to keep the process moving, even when you no longer want to be involved.
Can You Contact Your Partner If They’ve Been Charged with Domestic Assault?
If your partner has been charged, you should not contact them unless a court order says they can have contact with you. Most release conditions include a no-contact term, which means they cannot call, message, or meet you—even if you want them to.
Your consent does not override a court order. Even if you’re the one who wants contact, the order still applies. If your partner responds to your messages or answers your calls, they can be charged with breaching their release conditions. That new charge can carry worse consequences than the original domestic assault charge.
Some court orders include exceptions. For example, if you share children, the order might allow communication through a third party to arrange exchanges. The court might allow one-time police-supervised visits for your partner to pick up their belongings. But these exceptions must be written into the release conditions.
If your situation has changed and you want to reconnect, the order must be changed in court. The process usually begins with your partner’s lawyer asking the Crown to agree to a bail variation. If the Crown agrees, the change can happen on consent. If not, a judge must decide after a hearing.
You can also ask your own lawyer to tell the Crown that you support the change. If you don’t have a lawyer, you can go through VWAP to express your position. However, this doesn’t guarantee a change. The Crown will consider public safety and whether there’s a pattern of abuse.
Until a judge signs off on a new order, all no-contact conditions remain active. Any contact—even peaceful or initiated by you—can be used in court to show that your partner broke the law.
How Long Do Domestic Assault Trials Take?
Domestic assault cases can last anywhere from 18 to 30 months, depending on the severity of the case and how busy the courts are.
Most domestic assault cases are treated as summary conviction offences. These are less serious than indictable offences, but they can still take up to 18 months to complete. If the Crown elects to proceed by indictment—which happens when the allegations are more serious—the case can take up to 30 months.
Delays can happen at many stages. After the initial court appearance, there may be several administrative court dates. These are used to obtain disclosure, hire a lawyer, negotiate with the Crown, or obtain trial estimates. If the case doesn’t resolve early, it moves to trial, which must be scheduled around court availability.
Even before trial, the accused may have to follow strict conditions for months or years. These often include not contacting you, not returning home, or attending programs like the Partner Assault Response (PAR) program. These conditions can disrupt daily life and family arrangements.
Sometimes, the Crown agrees to resolve the case before trial. This can happen through a peace bond, a discharge, or other outcomes that avoid a conviction. These options usually require your partner to take responsibility in some way or complete certain steps, like attending counselling or showing that you support resolution.
You should be prepared for a drawn-out process. If you want to stay involved, you’ll have to attend court as a witness. If you don’t want that, it’s best to speak with a lawyer who can explain your options and help communicate your wishes to the Crown.
You can see our full guide on Domestic Assault Charges in Ontario here
X-Copper Can Help
If you’re trying to reverse domestic assault charges or change release conditions, you need clear guidance and legal help.
X-Copper’s experienced legal team will work with you or your partner to navigate the court process, communicate with the Crown, and explore options like affidavits, peace bonds, or bail variations. Contact us today to get started.
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